BDSM & Phone Sex Safe Practices
I am a little irked. Yes- actually, on a scale of irkiness from 1 -10, 1 being slightly peeved to 10 being irked to maximum volume, I would have to pick a 10. So, yes. I am writing today while in an irked state of mind.
Not cool mind you. However, I feel that this needs to be stated very clearly.
Always practice safe, sane, consensual phone sex play!
And to do that, to play this way includes having a safe word!
I am not interested in causing permanent damage. I am not interested in involving innocents and I am sure as hell not interested in seeing someone try to stick it out to impress me. If there is a problem or you just can’t handle it. You use the safe word. Doesn’t matter if it is a phone sex session.
I like that you pick something that is easy to remember and something like banana or yellow. I have guys use words like that in the past. I had a guy once want to use the word Octpussy Tee-hee and as fun as that word is. In the heat of the moment it might be hard to yell out. So keep it short.
Sensual tease Princess makes you hot!
Why was I irked when I started writing this, because sometimes people forget that it is important to keep safe, sane, and consensual play in all forms of BDSM scenes. You can still have a really hot phone sex domination time and stay in the confines of safe, sane and consensual.It is very important to discuss these things when creating a domination phone sex scene
Have a happy and kinky new year! Stay safe and remember safe, sane, consensual play!
I will be writing more about this subject at a future date.
Do you have a safe word?
I will capture your cock and penetrate your mind!
Princess Andi~
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Don’t you just LOVE when a submissive says … I’d do ANYTHING for you Mistress? It makes for the perfect time to teach a lesson and assign them a Safe Word. Some still balk.
What most don’t understand is that having a Safe Word in place, allows the Top the Freedom to push the envelope and hopefully give them more realistic and exciting and safe session. I want to hurt you, but after care should never be an ER visit. So say it LOUD and Proud, it proves your sanity 🙂
Thank you Fenris for taking such care in responding to this important topic. You bring up a very important point in the D/s relationship, trust–Trust is crucial for any long term healthy relationship, especially in a D/s relationship. I know you are in very competent hands with your beautiful Mistress. 🙂 I like to think that you are in trouble! *tee-hee* Are spankings in your near future? Gee, I hope so, Fenris! I hope so! *grin*
Sorry you had an upsetting experience Ms. Andi.
Being in a D/s relationship should be symbiotic and the sub must make their limits clear. Obviously a safe word is the best insurance of stopping things when they are going too far.
I think Ms. Catherine would be more upset/disappointed in me if I let something go on past my comfort level than telling her we need to stop. If a sub truly respects their Mistress they would never let things go to a point that would damage the trust necessary for a good relationship.
A competent Mistress will not push someone into things they do not want to do (on the phone or in person) and if one does it’s probably a sign to reevaluate things.
Now if I could just get a safe word set up to stop her taking notes! She was sifting through them on a call the other day. It was either every note she has taken on everyone here, a copy of The Brothers Karamazov, or I am in serious trouble.
Thank you Ms. Layla! I am looking forward to sharing more of my thoughts and feelings about this very important BDSM Community topic. XoXo
As always Ms. Andi, great post. You capture the need of safe words in kinky play perfectly. Having shared many kinky calls with you, I know you always have the safety and care of your callers as your first priority. Woe to those who do not respect your limits and boundaries. You create them for their well-being and don’t tolerate their being disrespected.
I can’t wait to read more of your thoughts on safe kinky sex!
🙂 there ya go! Very good spotSy! *sticks my tongue out at you*
Thank you Ms. Violet. I know what a supportive and caring phone mistress you are, that is unfortunate that you have experienced that. I am sure the phone sex caller in question is very lucky to have you to help him through it.
Thank you Ms. Delia. I love your comment! I appreciate you taking the time to share your thoughts on the subject. XoXo
Thank you bfla, I am glad you learned this from me. 🙂
Bettet safe word than sorry, I always say.☺
I am totally with you on the need for safety first, Princess Andi. Some guys think that because they are having a phone session, the usual BDSM rules go out the window. Actually, the need for safety is greater. There is no one there with that guy to see he is going too far and stop him. I am really glad you wrote about this topic. It is not a problem too often for me, but when it is…it is usually a doozie.
I am irked too….LOL. All these years of great phone sex with you and we have never had a safe word 🙂
Thanks for this very important post, Ms. Andi!!
Safe, sane, and consensual are not just words we throw around! They are HOW a scene SHOULD go! So many times I have heard in my kink circles about women who Domme without safewords. In all honesty, the kink community shuns them because it just is not safe!
Listen up guys…ALL responsible Dommes use a safeword! Don’t play without one!! …Seriously!
Ms. Delia
I know how important this is to you and sorry to hear something didn’t go exactly right. I learned the importance of this through my experiences with you and so yes, either the limits are clear before I start with someone or there is something I can say if it goes too far.